AF? yes...no?!?!

Well for a couple of days now I have been getting symptoms like my AF is coming.. Like the cramping (thats really it) feels like its going to come any moment at times. Over the weekend it was crazy!!! and my RE office did mention that if my proges is too low then it will trigger my AF to want to start.. OH WOE IS ME!!! I DONT WANT THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But God knows my desires and thoughts and I do believe that He has me in His arms. But its just hard to go through this month to month.. It is sooo draining.


God Please Help Me!

Weekend RECAP;Got my Car..Got a shot..Tired..Got to go to school!

Finally got my car back and she runs smooooooth! I LOVE my Honda!!! My DH wanted to take it from me.. I was like N-O! lol!!! not after my looong 6 months of not having it at ALL! My goodness how I missed my car!

So we went to Elizabeth NJ with our church last night.. Not bad going up but coming home was crazy!!! Wait let me take that back! b/c on our way up there we hit MAJOR conjestion then we got there and it was a store front church (not that its a bad thing) but there was no AC! Well they had one in the top of the door when you walked in but when you went in the sanctuary.. u started to sweat like u were in a sweat shop! LOL! Now dont get me wrong.. the preaching and teachings of my Bishop were on point as usual but just that hot stuffyness was not cool!! LOL! Even one of their speakers blew! and if you ever been around one then you would know what that odor is like! YUK! I thought I was gonna PUKE!! AUGH!!! Any how.. we got home somwhere close to the midnight hour and I had my dr. appt this morning @ 730am!

So I got my BW done to check my progest. still waitng for the call bck for those results..

God I want so bad to be pregnant... please see my heart and desire for children!

Tonight after I get off from work.. still have to run to my school to get everything ready for next week when I start! YAY!!! :D

So that is def. exciting for me and something to look forward too.. Also, I have a short week.. Im off on Friday! OH YEAH!!! its our convocation AND I take my blood PG test too! So PLEASE LORD show me FAVOR!!!! and everyone keep me in your prayers and good wishes.. Feel free to start from now! I want that Favor to come upon my life! I pray God sees it fit for it to happen NOW!!!!!!!

** UPDATE**

MY MOOD IS BACK TO GLUM... AND IM SERIOUSLY STARTING TO DISLIKE AND DISPISE PREGNANT WOMEN AND WOMEN WHO HAVE LITTLE BABIES.. ITS REALLY STARTING TO SET IN B/C IM HAVING SUCH A HARD TIME.. WHY ME LORD? WHY DO I HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS STRUGGLE AMUNG OTHER THINGS THAT I HAVE TO ENDURE?! ITS NOT FAIR..!!!! IM TIRED OF THIS! I HAVE FAITH BUT IM STILL TIRED PHYSICALLY AND ITS GETTING TO ME.. SO I HAD TO GET ANOTHER INJECTION! WHATEVER! IM JUST READY FOR MY BLESSING TO COME.. IM SERIOUSLY WANTING TO BE DONE W/ THIS.. AND POSSIBLY GETTING AN IUI.. IF THAT WILL WORK.. I HAVE A CONSULT W/ MY RE ON FRIDAY.. WE WILL SEE..

Progesterone ... oooh!

Well maybe I shouldnt be stressed as yet but it bothers me when stuff just doesnt look as good as it should. Went for my progesteron and was told that its borderline normal.. which doesnt mean that im not pregnant(-which i was told). but i cant help but to think that b/c if i am then its supposed to be higher to support my yolk sac.. It is so frustrating! I have to go bck to the dr. office today to get a 200ml suppositry that i have to take every night for about 9 days then take a proj and oil injection today when I go back!
:(

IM JUST A LITTLE BUMMED TODAY B/C FOR ONCE I WOULD LIKE MY BODY TO WORK THE WAY THAT ITS SUPPOSED TO BE! IM SOOOOO TIRED OF DISAPPOINTMENTS!

**update**
WENT TO THE DR AND GOT MY SHOT.. SUPRISINGLY IT WAS IN MY BUTT!! lol! BLASTED LUNCH TRAFFIC...I WAS LATE FOR WORK LIKE 20 MIN LATE!!! UGH!!! AND MY JOB IS AWESOME TO ALREADY WORK WITH ME WITH SUCH SHORT NOTICE.. ILL MAKE IT UP.. BUT ANYHOW.. GOT MY SUPPOSITORS IN THE FRIDGE.. TAKING IT TONIGHT.. SHOT IS KIND OF MAKING ME DIZZY! WOOOOO...WOOO... LOL!

Vrrooom... Vrroooommm... VRROOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!

( Not my car actually.. but a picture of the closest one online that I found)

I get my car back on friday!!! YAY!!! I miss my Honda! Driving one car has its advantages and disadvantages.. its good b/c it saves gas and I get to spend time w/ my DH.. but its hard when we have appointments or have to do different things or wait for one of us for school or work! UGH!!! it can get frustrating then! ... but im glad that we will have a choice now to ride together or what not! YAY!!!!! Its been since Feburary of this year 6 WHOLE months! haha!! half of a YEAR! WOW! SoooOOOooo when I go to my appt on Friday I will be driving my own car!!! YIPEEE!!! I miss it!

BTW.. what was wrong with it was that I messed up the engine.. I busted some gaskets?!? (i dont know what that means.. but its expensive!)

Oh yeah... and I had to cancel my Appt with my RE consultation.. more because of the money situation w/ the co pays being $30.00 each visit... so now I am just waitng for my progesterone to be checked on friday and monday and go back on friday for my bw preg. test.. if im not preggers then ill reschedule the appt for the consult w/ the dr.. im just so ready to be preggers.. I am praying that the Lord hears my desires and will come through for me..

Please, Lord Please,.. I declare In my life a child! In the name of Jesus!

Oh yeah... forgot to say..yesterday I wanted to take a preg test.. (just because) yah, yah.. i know its too early and the HcG may give me a false positive but I just HAD to do it b/c I just wanted to see a positive on a preg test.. I never did after all the tests that Ive had and I just wanted to see it for once.. so anyway, I took it! lol! a cheap one from a dollor store.. but I did see a faint pos.. sorry couldnt post it... didnt have a camera to take the pic.. but it was there.. now I am not too excited about it as I explained to reasoning above.. but I at least felt a little joy and it gave me hope that I may just be pregnant! Oh! that would be sooo lovely! I am soo ready to be a mommy! I cant wait!! I want my baby!! :)
Thank you Lord!

Sometimes I have to remind myself why I am doing this blog. Its for encouragement and maybe even help for others who may go through what I am going through. But I have to do this b/c some days I dont feel like writing but I know that this is apart of the process.

I am happy to inform all my readers that I have Ovulated!!!! YIPEEEEE 4 MEEEEEeeeee!!!! I am sooo excited.. I think that I am preggers!!! I really have a good feeling that I am!! We will see.. all my appts. are lined up to check my levels and stuff.. Im sooo excited!!!! YES!!!

Thank you God!!!! I am sooo greatful!

I am officially on my 2WW!!

Yeah, its exciting to be on my 2ww.. I went to the dr. office on Sat. morning to have my post coital test and everything looked Great!! the kids are moving in the right direction and my CM is right on the money.. Just hoping that the HcG injection allowed me to O and my egg is waiting there patiently AND they FINALLY get to meet! :)

I am soo excited and hoping that this is it. The only side effects Ive noticed aside from the extremely sore leg where I got my HcG shot in the thigh from.. was sore breasts and nausea. Also Ive noticed a little cramping on the right side (where my Follicle is) and also bad gas starting from last night! HA!!! TMI moment.. Oh well.. its my blog and that's what its here for anyways... :P

So I'm just waiting... waiting... waiting... but also praying.. praying... praying...praying... for my blessing to have come because I have also read a lot of pple who got the shot and still nothing.. so I'm praying for something and my baby to stick and have a healthy full term pregnancy! God please hear my prayers!!! Love always! :)

YiiiiiiPeeeeee!!!!!

Got my HcG shot today!!! so that way I should be able to "O" tonight!!!! YYYYeeeessss!!!! My follicle grew to about 33cm!! YAY!! and hormones are still up there even though of the slight drop yesterday.. but that doesn't matter b/c the HcG shot will blast them back up there and my follicle should burst and I should O tonight when me and DH do our thang! haha!!! :)

I'm soooo happy .. this could be it! I am praying that it is!! Tomorrow I'm going back in for another appt for my post coital test (confirmed) and again on Monday for verification that I did "O" I'm sooooOOooooo Excited!!!! YAY!!